


Pain at the piano

by CupOfEarleGrey



Category: Stardew Valley (Video Game)
Genre: F/M, Heartbreak, Memories, Missed Connection, Regret
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-28
Updated: 2019-03-28
Packaged: 2019-12-25 22:06:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 953
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18270176
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CupOfEarleGrey/pseuds/CupOfEarleGrey
Summary: Elliott remembers a time he played the piano and fell in love...and how that moment lead him to despair.





	Pain at the piano

His fingers moved dexterously along the keys. With each touch of his fingers a new note rang true in the tumult of sound. He had the song memorised to virtual muscle memory, requiring only a moment of foresight to the upcoming notes he must play. But as the music filled his ears, his eyes slid shut as a memory of the past swept upon him.

He had been playing just like he was now, but years in the past, before he had finished his first book. It was a momentary reprieve from the endless white noise in his mind - ideas that would never be utilised, agonising over every sentence he wrote, the overwhelming fear of failure. It's the curse of the writer's mind. There is no solace of thoughtlessness. Only the permanent turning of cogs.  
In the depth of his focus on the piano, he had missed the creak of the door and the brief gust of wind. Had he noticed it, perhaps he would have stopped his playing. But he continued onward obliviously until melody came to it's ultimate end. Once he had finished, he paused momentarily to ponder upon the end. The end that all things must eventually reach.

"That was wonderful." a voice from behind him had broken his reprieve, "How long have you been playing?"  
He had turned on his piano stool to see the farmer framed in the door. Her familiar face was adorned with a warm smile.  
"Thank you." he wasted no time in returning her smile, "I'm not very good, but it's fun to play."  
He had stood then and spoken to her of his anxieties and stress. The long hours of work had robbed him of much of his time. It was astounding to him how their friendship had managed to blossom amidst their busy days. She had not objected to his complaints, not even when he finished them by trivialising her own profession.  
"You could come live on the farm with me." she had offered.

This had caught him by surprise. Although he was certain she had not meant it in that fashion, he briefly imagined them together as a couple. Their arms and hands covered in dirt as they prepared their fields for fresh crops, at their table in the farmhouse tucking into their homegrown steamed vegetables and hand held walks beneath the orchards in summer. Colour rose into his cheeks as he stared at her in disbelief.  
Then the spell had been broken. Reality returned and he realised that she had meant it as little more than a job offer. He turned away and told her he had to focus on his novel. A reminder more to himself than to her that his dream must always come first. Little did he know then, that he had fallen in love with her. And more so, that he would regret turning down her blessed offer.

Long months after had done nothing more than deepen his feelings for her. He found himself chasing after every smile, lingering thoughtfully on her every word and caught himself distractedly wondering what she was doing while they were apart. She inspired him so much so that it was only natural he dedicated his book to her. In doing so, he felt that he was indirectly confessing how he truly felt about her. But while he saw her flush with embarrassment and glee, she did not seem to grasp his subtext.  
He left the museum with a mingled feeling of accomplishment and disappointment. If dedicating his novel to her had not been enough, what then would be enough to earn her affection. It plagued his mind like a ghost.

Weeks trailed by as he agonised over his feelings and desires. It was only when he almost toppled over it in his distraction that the idea came. The old boat by his cabin would be the perfect opportunity. Diligently he worked upon repairing the decrepit old thing, crafting it into a vessel worthy of carrying a gentlemen and a lady across the waves.  
But no sooner had he finished the final touches, had his dreams been unceremoniously crushed. News reached him that the farmer had engaged herself to another. He had stared so long at Gus, the one who had informed him, that the man had grown uncomfortable and excused himself.

An agony he had never anticipated encapsulated him. He felt as though he were in the boat, drifting endlessly across a violent ocean, heading towards the void. He had lost the one woman he had ever truly loved. All due to his inaction. His agonising over the details. How hard had it truly been to tell her outright at the book ceremony. Now he was destined to watch from afar as she married another. It was a horror he was unwilling to live through.  
He had returned to his cabin that night and packed his possessions carelessly into his suitcase. By the time Pam reached the bus, he was already sat at the stop waiting for her. While she had looked questioningly at him, he had made no effort to explain himself. All he had wanted was to get away from Pelican town forever.

Elliott opened his eyes once more. His fingers had slid off the keys and silence rang out like a bell. Regret bubbled in his gut. Although it had been years since he had set foot in Pelican Town, he knew that his heart still lived there. But he also knew that she loved another, and not him. But he still couldn't help but wonder that if he had stayed and let his feelings be known - that he would not have achieved his real dream after all.


End file.
